Another brilliant piece from a GUNNAS WRITING MASTERCLASS writer.
I like girls. No, not like that. This is not my big moment of coming out or anything. I just want to put on the record up front that I like girls – after all I am one, I have a wonderful mum and some amazing sisters, a gorgeous daughter and a good number of fantastic female friends.
But I love men. I love their energy, their enthusiasm, the way they radiate strength and leadership, their keen desire to solve problems. I love the way they don’t take themselves so seriously, yet at other times can be absolutely driven to achieve their goals and dreams.
I love their sense of humor and the way they laugh and joke with each other. Men aren’t generally critical or judgmental. Or yet again, they are … between men, the worse the insult the greater the friendship between them.
I love watching boys grow into men; I love watching men with their sons.
Men look good, they feel good and they smell good – what’s not to love?
This I know is unusual. Many women I know value their female friendships above all others. I’ve even met some who say they love their “besty” more than their husband!
Sorry girls, and this is not to say that there isn’t great things about the female of the species, but I reckon there are some things about men that are simply wonderful – and yes, sometimes better.
In many aspects of my life I have been and continue to be surrounded by men, particularly in my work. Much of this is by choice. Often I am the only girl in the room. Many times I don’t even notice that this is the case…
While my husband was one of the best choices I’ve made in my life and my son was an amazing gift, I have also, without realizing it, choreographing it, or planning it, surrounded myself with men in so many other areas of my life – Doctor, Dentist, Personal Trainer, Hairdresser, Chiropractor, Accountant, … hell even my cleaning lady is a bloke! If I could find a man who waxes legs, I’d be there in a flash.
Currently I work as the manager of a football club, and in my working community I have around me 60 or so players, several coaches, a president and a committee – all men. Male dominated – you betcha, but I love it!
I like the simplicity of the way men talk. Facts, not stories. For example “ The tap broke, but I got a washer and replaced it. It’s fixed.” Man talk. Women on the other hand would tell the whole story. That’s just how it is. A woman would probably say “Anyway, I was getting ready to go out, and of course I had to clean my teeth, so I turned on the tap and it was an enormous disaster because it just spurted out everywhere and I couldn’t turn it off, so I had to go and turn it off at the mains, and fortunately I knew where the spare washers were, and I remembered how to replace it, and it took 15 minutes and I ended up running late, but at least it’s fixed…..”
So, especially when I am working with men, I try to remember to talk like them. Just the facts please lady. Otherwise they’ve lost interest by the time you get past “Anyway, I was just ….” If you look closely enough, you can actually see their eyes start to glaze over if you don’t cut to the chase.
They don’t think so much … this doesn’t mean they are stupid or not clever. They are just much more decisive. They choose easily, they make a decision and then they relax. Women are much more likely to think and oscillate and think some more, then discuss and consider, then worry if they’ve made the right decision!
Men relax so much better than women. Men can actually sit on the couch, or at the pub, or on the beach and just think about nothing – now there’s a skill I wish I could master! There are times when if you ask them what they are thinking about (incredibly some women do this often – it drives men crazy), their response is “nothing” and you know what? They are actually thinking about …. nothing. Absolutely nothing … really and truly! They can actually do that.
Life can also be a whole lot less complicated if you are a man. Consider dress code. Recently I got an invitation that said Gentlemen: Lounge Suit, Ladies Accordingly – what is that meant to mean?? But you know what? It doesn’t matter if the dress code is Formal, Cocktail, Lounge Suit, or Smart Casual, for a man that generally means pants and some kind of shirt … every single time. For a woman it’s a whole kaleidoscope of possibilities!
Especially through my work in football, I’ve been privileged to be included in their inner sanctum. I’ve been crushed in the hugs of absolute exhilaration and achievement and I’ve also shared the tears of bewildering sorrow. I’ve laughed and sung and hung in there alongside them to pick up the pieces when things didn’t quite go to plan.
As I said, I like women, and I could probably write another piece on why women are so wonderful – but if you want fun, laughs, simplicity, energy and honesty, grab your best man friend and go and hang out.
If the apocalypse is nigh, while many of the girls are still deciding what to wear to the finale or who they want to spend the last hours with, you’ll find me with the blokes. They’ll already be having a drink and a laugh, reminiscing about the great times we’ve had, rather than screaming in fear that its all about to end.
Follow Jo on Twitter – @jotregear