Another brilliant piece from a GUNNAS WRITING MASTERCLASS writer
“Dear all,
The other day, while I was perusing an online dating site, I realised that I owed all of the important people in my life an apology.
I was reading the profiles of potential partners who met my very specific criteria and imagining a life with each of them that includes saving children in Africa and meeting Oprah Winfrey, and I suddenly realised that I hadn’t been at all honest with you, my family and friends.
Most of you know me as a wonderful human being. A brilliant mother, supportive daughter and sister, caring friend and tireless community worker. And while these labels are all accurate, there is one label that I have spent the last 30 or so years hiding from all of you.
I am a cheat.
Yes. I am a cheat.
When I was in 4th grade, aged 9 or so years, I cheated on a spelling test. The word was calamity, and I looked over to the desk beside me and read Prudence Smith’s answer and copied it onto my own page.
The fact of this, and of my hiding it from you, necessitates a re-evaluation of every relationship in my life. Obviously, my relationships with you are based upon a profound dishonesty and are therefore invalid.
I realised this when contemplating my perfect partner. I realised that I could not contemplate becoming involved with anyone who could lie to me. And, in realising that, I quickly recognised that I could not stay involved with anyone whom I could lie to.
I have lied to you all.
And so I now free you from our friendships and relationships.
Yes, that includes all of my family members.
I know that this will come as a devastating blow to all of you. The idea of not having me in your lives will be terrifying, I know. But I honestly believe that naming my deception will ultimately allow all of us to become better people. Hopefully you will all realise that you are as flawed, if not more, than I am, and will create a space for this kind of honesty in your own lives. I’m looking at YOU.
So. This weekend I will be having a garage sale of sorts. I will put every item that has been gifted to me by any of you out onto my front lawn at 8am and I invite you to come over to collect them at your leisure.
And then I will live my life with an honesty and integrity and clarity that can only attract a partner of the highest standard, and I will be happy.
With thanks and love to you all,
Janet.
PS. Please do not respond to this email. My days of tolerating you all are over.
PPS. I will notify you all of major events occurring in my life, as a courtesy and kindness to you all, you understand.
PPPS. I am sure I will be re-marrying, as I have just virtually-kissed a perfect man on the dating site.
PPPPS. I wish you all well.”