Last week I sent a picture of myself in my bathers/togs/swimsuit/cossie to my mate Mia Freedman at Mama Mia with the subject line, ‘I’m 80kg, size 16, I run, swim, cycle, strip of and shag at every opportunity’ after she wrote a piece about women being too body conscious to swim at a pool party. We did a little interview you can read here. It went off.
This lead to feminista, bon vivant and notorious boner killer Clementine Ford to write this cracking piece for The Drum.
Clem and I got together on Saturday here at The Atheist Kibbutz deep in the heart of The People’s Republic Of Moreland and banged on a bit about it thus (yes I just said thus) creating my first podcast! Have a listen and and I hope it gives you a big fat happy. The podcast is called Stay On Your Flower. It’s explained why at the end. In our next podcast we’ll be banging on about porn and why it’s crucial we encourage young girls to masturbate early and often.
Here’s another great piece on the topic by Pip Lincoln who also has an awesome site, craft, food, cool stuff. And just in ANOTHER ripper piece by Pip on the subject.
A recent study suggests women who dress provocatively are likely to be criticised by their peers amid fears they pose a threat to those in otherwise monogamous relationships.
****JUST IN! A cracking piece by my darling Clementine on body hate.
Not only have I never heard of skinny bashing but I can’t see how any rational person could accuse me of attempting to elevate the curvy body shape above others in the interview. These chinless mouth breathers prove, yet again, some people can’t or don’t read or just like to find fault or feel victimised for any reason. My point was and is that there are many other gorgeous body shapes than the one presented by the media. Mine is just one. And I love it. There are others. Feel free to love, cherish and flaunt yours. Just don’t feel you have to starve yourself and be grumpy to love up to something that’s not you. And no, it wasn’t brave and I wasn’t nervous at all. And I did not approve or agree with the ‘still’ in the line ‘I’m-80kg-and-still-happy’. Happy. Rapt. Not still. Not despite. No qualifications.
Great people do things. Average people talk about doing things. Small people find fault with other people doing things.
My reference to ‘some men will always prefer curvy’ was simply again addressing the myth there is only one type of desirable, acceptable and healthy body shape (says fucking who?), men are the only ones attracted to women’s body shape (hello ladies who love perving at and / or sexing other ladies!), sexual attraction is the only yardstick to judge body shapes (what?) that the sexual attractiveness is is defined by some invisible infallible commitee (sorry, you don’t exists) and people are only attracted to one type of body shape (any person can be attracted to many and varied types.)
The photo was taken by my mate Carla. It was never intended for publication. Just fun. Months ago. There was no fake tan, no personal trainer, no handwringing. I wore lipstick and that’s all. I hadn’t even had a shower. Had I known the journey this snap would take I would have worn mascara, painted my toenails, brushed my hair and my teeth. We were not making a point. Just taking a photo. We took many that day. Different outfits. Different poses. It wasn’t about me in my bathers. But that was one of shots I had so I sent it off.
Heaps of positive (but unnecessary) feedback. I must admit was amazed by the viciousness of the trolls. Self hating haters. Poor things. So glad I’m not them. Who are these voices in their heads and how did they get there? And why do they feel so compelled to inflict them on other women? These are THE RULES! This is THE TRUTH. You are WRONG! Change or apologize.
I’ve come up with a term to explain how women particularly (but not exclusively) undermine those who stray from the pressure of expectation they themselves feel crippled by, ‘ego policing‘.
As my friend Kelly said ‘There’s nothing more people hate than a woman who’s happy with herself’.
Well bite me.